A Drafty Cabin: My Spiral Into Procrastination
Being a writer, I do a lot of weird things in the name of procrastination. Yesterday I made a super-volcano in my washing machine with baking powder and vinegar (it cleans the inside). I often pull out my magnification mirror and play amateur face surgeon until it appears that I have meth sores. I monitor my house for poltergeists. I think about lunch, a lot.
Recently, with the help of my kids, I’ve started watching YouTube videos. No, I’m not eighty years old, I just act like it. I was surprised at the endless cooking shows that make me feel inadequate in the kitchen. I was momentarily charmed by ASMR videos, until Mr. Zach Choi started eating next to a microphone. There were makeup and murder mystery combos. I watched a man detail minivans, stories about skateboarders’ broken bones, tours of multi-million dollar homes, sidewalk chalk artists, cute dogs, impossible basketball shots….and on and on and on.
When I found this kid in Sweden building a cabin with his bare hands, I felt rugged and accomplished. I was relaxed, being in nature with him. This video went against the unspoken rules of all the other YouTube videos by lasting for almost two hours.
My son, who has previewed ALL of YouTube, caught me watching and announced that I was going to be disappointed by the ending. What? This wasn’t some plot-driven thriller. The kid was building a cabin the slow way. I couldn’t keep my anxiety at bay—would a bear attack? Would he paint the whole thing a horrible shade of pink? Would he break his leg, or worse, would his dog get hurt?
Spoiler: I watched this dude for two hours (over a year of his life). He made a fantastic cabin, carved out windows, did the whole thing by himself, but DIDN’T PUT ON A ROOF. What in the hell? I committed two hours of my life to four walls. That’s no cabin, it’s not even a shed or an outhouse. Even garbage cans have lids.
My procrastination has dipped to an all-time low, quality-wise. Perhaps the universe is sending a message—finish your work!